I happens more often than I’d like to admit, but on days when I’m feeling overwhelmed, whether it’s from a long work day, a new restriction update, an irritating brush with a stranger, or the hot water being out, once I get to that point, I have to stop all things. If music is blasting and the kids are fighting, or even if Anthony and I are just talking, I have to stop all noise. It’s as if my senses are completely overloaded and I need just one sense to be without aggravation.

I went through a few week spans where that was happening a lot more than it usually does.

In the lead up to the US 2020 election, I was deeply aware of the ongoings of the political world. I believe as an American voter, it is my duty to be informed and to do my research. I made it a point to cross check facts from different media as all have some sort of leaning. I was plugged in with the biggest influencers in my demographic and was constantly checking in on the latest accusations, big reveals, and theories around the election.

I don’t regret this, necessarily. I do still believe it is American voters’ duty to be informed and to voice opinions in the form of the vote.

Even as someone who is proud to have the opportunity to vote, who adamantly defends my beliefs, and who has always been intrigued by politics, I was wearing thin by the daily updates, the misinformation, and the misinformed.

But even as well intentioned as I felt I was, I walked alway from my days feeling like I needed to stop everything because my brain could not handle any more noise.

The only word I could use to describe it was “heaviness.” But, in hindsight, I recognized a feeling in myself that was far worse than carrying weight—it was hopelessness.

I found myself so engulfed in all that was happening in the world that I felt helpless to change it. My senses were fried. I was dedicating all of my emotional energy to keeping up with the latest updates and defending my views ardently.

The country was on fire in more ways than one. Racial tension came to a peak, political disagreement became synonymous with personal hatred, riots were breaking out across the nation, and media platforms went from being news reporters to sales engines—and most of us were and are buying it.

We’ve allowed self-righteousness to overtake grace.

We’ve placed all our hope in the changing of a calendar year or the shift or a continuation of a presidency. And, if you are among this cohort of misplaced hope—like I was—I believe we will be severely disappointed.

Fear has been peddled to us and we’ve consumed it.

Whether it has been focused on the election, the pandemic, or the economy, we have taken the bait and gave it a home in our hearts. The verse that kept coming back to me was Timothy 1:9:

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

I think if we critically look at what is going on in the world today, so much of it can be traced back to fear.

Fear has been peddled to us and we’ve all consumed it.

In the name of being “informed,” I, like so many others, began to bargain my hope for it. Instead of leaning on God, I was leaning on media. Instead of trusting in His strength, I was using my own.

There is a lot of good that can be done with knowledge and social platforms. However, for me, there was certainly more harm.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

Timothy 1:9

While it’s important that we all have informed opinions on what is going on in current events, we are not each alone meant to hold all the weight that comes in a sin-filled world. What we can each contribute is based on the purpose God has called us to. And at least for now, I don’t believe mine is to be a political advocate. I believe I am called to put my energy into my faith, my marriage, my children, my friendships, and and my work.

I’ve been saying that I want to focus on “my corner of the universe” and on where I can be the biggest impact. For me, that’s in my home.

I’ve decided to stop fear before it gets to me. So, I’ve deleted my Facebook and Instagram accounts and have tried to instead use that time to invest in activities that are growing me as a wife, mother, friend, employee, and woman of faith.

For me, that means spending more time listening to uplifting faith-centered podcasts, and music, and reading books that are food for my soul. It’s also spending time on home projects with Anthony—working together toward a common goal. And spending more time with my boys.

I’d invite you all to figure out where noise is getting into your life and drawing your attention away from your true calling. Right now, I see the enemy using current events to take precious time away from what we are all intended to do. Even if that is being involved in politics, how you deliver on that calling is just as important as that you do.

I’ve decided to stop fear before it gets to me.

I already feel much lighter. Much more focused on the people and things that truly matter. And much quieter internally.

I do highly recommend unplugging, even if it’s only for a short period of time to see how much different you feel. I wish you all peace and hopefulness at the close of a challenging year.

Remember, we serve a good God, and He has already seen us through all of this. We have ETERNAL hope because we live in Him.